Martians! At Grovers Mill!!!!

"A humped shape is rising out of the pit. I can make out a small beam of light against a mirror. What's that? There's a jet of flame springing from the mirror, and it leaps right at the advancing men. It strikes them head on! Good Lord, they're turning into flame!"

- Eyewitness at Grovers Mill, NJ, October 30, 1938

It turns out that lots of things went down in 1938; for instance, a martian landing in the very nice town of Princeton, New Jersey! We went to Princeton because it's in between JFK Airport (where Warren patiently waited curbside for well over an hour while I was stuck in traffic) and Philadelphia (where my sister lives), but more specifically because it contains a park that contains a monument of the 1938 Martian Landing Site. I mean, with a claim like that, who wouldn't want to see it with their own two eyes (strictly a rhetorical question)?

It was pouring. I mean, like, there was so much water that we waded knee-deep through this windy faux forest that led to a lake that was also flooding and a tiny covered pavilion where a kid's failed birthday party(complete with a disgruntled looking clown making balloon animals for forlorn kids)was underway and, and here is the good part, this:


It's a small monument, entirely shielded from human eyes on one side by a series of large bushes. But its glory couldn't be hidden from our eagle eyes. "This looks about right," Warren said as we waded deeper into the swamp (aka, former grassy knoll). And it was.

It was ("it" now being the martian landing) also one of the best hoaxes ever played by the mass media on its mass audience. Here's what Roadside America has to say about the whole hubbub: "In 1938, scorching annihilation from outer space was still a relatively new concept to the average Joe. Orson Welles and his Mercury Theater ensemble put on one of the world's great hoaxes when they broadcast a radio adaptation of H. G. Wells' War of the Worlds the night before Halloween, October 30th. Twelve million people heard the fake 'live news' broadcast, and many were convinced an attack from Mars was underway. The Martian landings were centered around the little-known but real town of Grovers Mill, near Princeton."

And that, my friends, is why I <3 America.

This one goes out to you, the heroes, a song I could not stop humming the whole adventure:

"Nothing Ever Happens On Mars" from Waiting for Guffman

best cure for panic attacks = jousting

Seriously. This is what happened: Prince William turned 27, spring officially turned into summer, and I turned 25. I can say this with zen-like calm now, but Friday it was another story. Friday I was like, "25 is so OLD!" And, "But I...don't...wanna...be 25!!!" [said in the escalating, whiny manner of a two-year-old preparing for a tantrum. You are familiar, I am sure]. There was stomping and pouting and, yes, actual tears at one point. So I helped tear down and build a fence. Because that tends to help. But what really saved me was the next day, when Warren picked me up and took me to a magical place known only to a few lucky elite...

Yes, my friends, I am talking about Medieval Times--the "restaurant" staged around a great sand pit where wiry teens with poor facial hair don glittery leggings (aka, "chain mail") and shiny body armor and pretend to run lances/axes/swords/clubbed-balls-attached-to-chains into each other for the peace of their kingdom. A sand pit around which--according to the website--"privileged royal guests are transported to faraway lands including a romantic snowy rendezvous in the woods and an authentic medieval tournament -- with the help of Hollywood-caliber special effects, of course." Of course!

There is no better cure for a birthday-induced panic attack than watching this:

Whilst eating this:

And hoping against hope that this man:

will press one of his carnations to his lips and toss it in your general direction (this is not even remotely made up. After each game, the winning knights ride around the sand pit with a rose clamped between their teeth throwing flowers they've graced with a kiss to the screaming audience. If that's not drama, I don't know what is.)

Our knight, the yellow knight was "well-versed in the arts of chivalry, yet in attack, he was the lion uncaged!" We totally "Let the ring of steel herald his arrival and the smoke of battle linger in his wake" because "a legend of the Realm walked among us." This was actual dialogue, which is making you dizzy and a little bit swoony right now, I can tell.

It was, in the only word I know to properly express my feelings, awesome.

[Warren should get major points for not only taking me to a place where I could eat an entire roast chicken with my bare fingers (so romantic), but also for taking me to Dangerously Delicious Pies in Baltimore (so dangerous, so delicious)), chopping up strawberries and peaches at 3 in the morning to top the divine homemade blueberry pancakes he made me for breakfast in bed, pretending that my panic attack was endearing, taking me on a long calming walk that included an invigorating tree climb, washing all varieties of dishes, saying and doing every wonderful thing, and basically making me feel like the world's most loved person on my traumatic 25th. I know, you totally want to shake his hand now.]

Finally, if you were wondering whether or not Warren and I were the oldest people there, you would be right to. We were not. Birthday shout outs went to a few 41, 54, and 85-year olds. Miracles never cease.

My cousin, My hero

My cousin helped organize a grassroots protest against the ridiculous LAUSD school board who has pink slipped 70% of her school's teachers.

She says, "Teaching is a lifestyle, it's not a job. I'm here for the kids." You really don't need proof to believe that, but read this blog post and this one (about field trips), and if that's a teacher who should be pink slipped...we have serious, serious issues.

i love choreography

not gonna lie, definitely watched this one five times in a row. i'm particularly fond of the snap at 1:35. thank you luke for sharing this gem!

Iowa Tour Pt. III

Well friends, I finished finals/grading/packing and made it across this great nation to Philadelphia where I've been having a rip-roaring time with the fam (more about that later, but let's just say my goat dreams were fulfilled--I know, you're on the edge of your chair now. In good time, in good time.) But, before this semester ended, Warren came to visit so we had a special Tour Iowa edition, including a trip up to Minneapolis (so many lakes, so many gay 90s clubs--not correlated) to visit his niece, the adorable Emeline. But before that we did ever so many things like, for instance:

1) The bluffs of Iowa!!!!! I'm still not entirely sure what a bluff is but Sarah (who recommended Palisades State Park--a total gem) says it's like a cliff. Or, "a steep headland, promontory, riverbank, or cliff," as Webster specifies. Anyway, it was real nice. And a lone fisherman made it quite the tableau. We also went to Coralville Dam, which is about as interesting as it sounds when it is pouring rain, hence the lack of photographs.


2) But I'll tell you what is so interesting you could weep with joy: Solon, Iowa!!!!! Home to 1,700 good American folks, Solon also sports one of the hippest mainstreets in Iowa. See Exhibit A (Home of the best pork tenderloin in Iowa--not the USA or the world, mind you, Solon is a very down to earth place. And it did not dissapoint. The sandwiches were literally as big as our heads!) & B (supposedly a very delicious organic, farm-raised, la-di-da restaurant that was unfortunately very closed for lunch):
A.
B.












3) Next up was the adventure known as Sharpless Auction!!!!! This was only my second time back to Sharpless (the first time I left with some sweet bounty, if you remember the squirrel/acorn salt & pepper shakers). This time, not only were they having the usual amazing consignment auction, but they were also having the annual boats/RVS/fancy jewlry auction! I'm here to tell you that heaven can't wait, because it's at Sharpless Auction. Not to be missed...

...the creepy pilgrim (?) mask going for who knows how much. I'm still terrified.

...& the KOALA PLANT STAND! I totally lust after this thing and you can see exactly why:













We made a quick pit stop at the Natural History Museum!! (quite possibly one of my favorite places in Iowa City, mostly to check out Rusty our giant ice age ground sloth that my dear friend Kendra gets to dress up--it was Rosie the Riveter for Women's History Month, if that gives you any idea how awesome (s)he looks dressed up--there is also quite the hubbub concerning its actual sex. For years they've called it a "he" but recently research shows that it may very well be a "she." Total drama-rama!

4) On the way up to Minneapolis we decided to hit up the Pella Tulip Festival!!!!!!! It was just like being in Holland BUT BETTER [yes, that is a blatant lie]! But it was pretty amazing. There was, for instance, my all time favorite carny treat--funnel cake. Smothered in strawberry preserves and powdered sugar. Dreams keep coming true in Iowa, folks. Oh, and there were like windmills and giant clogs and a giant coronation throne for the tulip queen and small children dancing in old Dutch outfits and the oldest man playing a rickety organ, and yes, tulips galore.















5) And of course, Minneapolis!!!!! If it wasn't enough to love it for its many lakes & gorgeous cityscape, then the sparkling palm tree (very Lisa Frank) shimmering over a store front would be enough to endear it to you. What really sealed the deal for me was the Gay 90s Club. A total wonder, complete with a motorcycle displayed in the second floor window. I can only imagine the play list at this place...and oh, what joy it brings me!

I got to meet the delightful Cook family--parents of the lovely Emeline--and also Long Lost Cousin Jim! The Cooks were wonderful hosts and took us to this hole in the wall Mexican restaurant, which was everything I could hope for and more. We took Emma to the library for reading time and got to sing songs, read board books, and hug a gorilla (stuffed animal, unfortunately). All in all, Iowa/Minneapolis Tour May 2009 was a total hit!

pardon my gush

There are times when teaching makes me feel like I'm dying but there are times like now where it is so, completely worth it. Like tonight, when I just finished reading 20 rather spectacular student papers. We read Extremely Close & Incredibly Loud and I was astounded (though I shouldn't have been) at how much my students loved it. I didn't want to do a boring analytical paper so I asked them to channel the characters' styles in one of two ways: 1) Write a "Stuff that happened to me" like Oskar's, only have it be about your life using Oskar-style-techniques (inventions, blocked dialogue, imagination, precocity, etc.) or 2) Write a letter from the grandfather to the grandmother and one from the grandmother to the grandfather saying everything you think should be said. I know I did this last semester, but I was just so utterly delighted with how these turned out that I had to share some of the highlights:

My snarkiest (and smartest) student included snapshots of graffiti on her favorite bridge. Among them: "Abby will you marry me?" "Michelle, I love you and I hope we are together as long as these bridges are here. Larry." "To the love I hope to find -Jacob."

My jock-iest student gave me this lovely meditation: "I would go home, tell my grandma "I'm here for you,: and tell my parents and my little sister "I love you." I think the word love is what separates us as human beings from everything else on earth. We are capable of this emotion of attachment and care that no other species can have. I want everybody to be able to tell their loved ones that they love them."

My laziest student gave me this: "If I had another life, we would live in a tiny house inside a piano. We would live on one string and someone would start to play the most beautiful song in the world. We would live happily as hammers fell all around us hitting different notes until one day the pianist would reach the best part of the song and play the string we lived on. Our house would be crushed by our string's hammer and we would be killed. But we would die knowing we were part of something beautiful." [!!!!!!!!!!!!?????? amazing]

And yes, of course, I cried and cried, I was so proud and pleased.

tween studies final

1. The hit 1999 tween romantic comedy, Drive Me Crazy, was based on what fabulous tween book?
A. How I Created My Perfect Prom Date
B. The Boy Next Door
C. Makeover Madness

2. The prom scene from the hit 1999 tween romantic comedy, Drive Me Crazy, was filmed in what state capitol's rotunda?
A. California
B. Utah
C. Florida

3. What famous hobbit was supposed to co-star with Sabrina/Clarissa in the hit 1999 tween romantic comedy, Drive Me Crazy, but was cut because of his baby face?
A. Pip
B. Rudy
C. Frodo

Answers: 1. A 2. B 3. C

Oh, and I just finished taking my last real final of my first real year of graduate school! We celebrated, as if you couldn't tell, by having the last tween studies film proseminar. Drive Me Crazy was a complete and total hit, mostly because Adrian Grenier is a complete and total babe. Exhibit A:

And, as Drive Me Crazy proved, Timezone High could never recover from a face like that. Could you? Didn't think so :)